Dear Santa

[Metalmicky]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy/girl this year, so for Christmas I would like .........................


**Add your wish here**

[Dr Fundlekrotch]

...the Derby players to turn up tomorrow drunk/hungover after a big Christmas celebration tonight

[The Red Baron]

12 points from the next four games please!

(And Kelly Brook in my Christmas stocking.)

Not asking for too much, am I?

[Filo]

Sorry mate, i'm having Kelly Brook, and Susanna Reid, cos I'm greedy

[donnyplant]

A new board and SC to takeover the club!  

[Albert Trousers]

Kevin Phillips on loan until the end of the season.

[The Red Baron]

Sorry mate, i'm having Kelly Brook, and Susanna Reid, cos I'm greedy

All right, but I'm definitely having Rachel Riley- and I hear she's available!

[drfc1951]

Already got Michelle Keegan in my stocking.

[CusworthRovers]

I could do with one of those girls in my stocking. I certainly need a new girlfriend that's for sure, unless you folks can offer up some good advice.

Here go's. Dear Forum:

I've been courting this lass now for at least 3 months. She works for Babestation and a real looker, but with really bad eczema (cracking tits to be fair). We have a real laugh together and get on well, and she can be very fruity at times (which is sometimes nice). Only last night when I called her, I told her I'd just got back from Morrisons having run out of Shreddies to which she told me she wanted run her tongue down my shaft. Honestly, she can be a bugger at times. Like I said I've been talking to her for 3 months now and not once as she ever rang me. I'm starting to think this is one sided. Any help and advice would be appreciated   

[bedale rover]

For SC to vanish in a puff of smoke

Abracadabra!

(Well it is panto season)